dealing with a Man suffering from LDBS (Lazy Dead Beat Syndrome) Over the past 50 years, there has been a rise in the number of men suffering from LDBS. It’s a horrible debilitating illness that doesn’t just affect the recipient but also those close to them including their wives and children. There hasn’t been much research into the condition and many women caring for a man with this disorder do not receive the support that they might need. I have put together a list of signs and symptoms of LDBS and followed it up below with a list of hints and tips on some remedial action that can be taken to totally eradicate this awful affliction.
Signs and symptoms of LDBS
- The inability to go to work or hold down a stable job. LDBS sufferers may find it difficult working full time for long periods. They may work a few hours per week or coast from job to job earning just enough to pay for their mobile phone bill, play golf and a buy a few beers/kebabs a couple of time per week.
- An aversion to taking pride in their environment. Dirty laundry often left on the floor, beer cans and wrappers left as far away from the bin as possible. They may potentially dislike keeping up with personal hygiene and only shower once a week.
- Zero participation in any kind of chores. These men really struggle with washing the dishes or picking up a vacuum cleaner. It’s such a debilitating disease.
- If they are fathers, it’s typical for a man with LDBS to also suffer from CMP (Child maintenance phobia). This man will go out of his way to ensure that the only person taking financial responsibility for his child is the mother. This is a very common symptom and should be taken quite seriously. They may also lack interest in their children. Any activities such as bath time, going to the park, days out etc. are usually always facilitated by the mother.
- They throw the word ‘sorry’ around like it’s going out of fashion or they never say it at all. Often when a man with LDBS has done something to upset his partner and she makes it known to him, he will mutter sorry under his breath before doing exactly the same thing the following day. On the other end of the spectrum some LDBS sufferers are narcissistic in nature and refuse to acknowledge any fault whatsoever on their part. They often make their partners feel like they are the ones with the problem.
- Being in debt and never having any money. Now don’t get me wrong, there are many people in this world that are hard workers that are struggling for money because of lack of work, poverty stricken areas etc. The difference is that these people are trying and they don’t exhibit any of the signs and symptoms noted above. LDBS sufferers may never seem to be able to pay their bills and often contact family members and friends for loans which they can never pay back. This loan money however will not be spent on household or children but usually on vices such as cigarettes and alcohol
- They are unable to hold down a relationship for long or have a long history of going from woman to woman. He has likely never lived on his own and if he has, certainly not for long. The chances are before you, he was living with his mother or another woman. Basically just jumped from one set of apron strings to another.
So do you feel you might be dating someone with this disorder? If so I have some advice for you. Get out now. You are not his mother and the more you do for him, the worse the symptoms will get. If that’s not an option or he’s your husband/father of your kids then you could try the following:
Do you wash his clothes? Then stop. Let him run out of underwear and watch him put on a washing cycle once he knows he has no underwear left. Does he leave beer cans/ dirty socks and food wrappers on your sofa? Put them on his pillow or in his car and keep doing it until he stops. Don’t lend money to him and stop cooking him dinner.
It’s a bit like treating them like teenagers, if they can’t listen, they must feel- no not in the physically abusive way. The condition will soon start to resolve itself and if it doesn’t then you seriously need to think about whether you are happy living with it forever (because this disease is life long without treatment) or if you’d rather not have your sons growing up replicating his behaviour. Food for thought. If anyone has any other suggestions on how to treat & eradicate LDBS please comment below 🙂